19 June 2018

'Ding.' The sound of an incoming message disturbs the silence in Nawal’s* kitchen. She had just been preparing lunch for her young children. It’s a WhatsApp message from an unknown number. Just a few words - an encouraging message in Arabic. She knows this is a message from her Christian friend, letting her know that she is praying for her.

Nawal bows her head, closes her eyes for a second and whispers 'Amin', the Arabic word for 'Amen'. She answers the message briefly, deletes the whole conversation from her phone and resumes her cooking.

This is what Nawal’s faith looks like now. She is so afraid that anyone - especially her husband - will find out about her faith in Christ that she hardly dares to answer messages from other believers. If she does, she keeps it superficial with no hints pointing to the Christian faith. She also stopped reading the Bible on her laptop because she was afraid her husband would check her internet history and find out that she is following Jesus.

Saudi Arabia is number 12 on the 2018 World Watch List, Open Doors’ annual ranking of the 50 countries where Christians face the most extreme persecution. According to Saudi law, if Nawal's husband does discover her faith, he is entitled to beat her, divorce her or even kill her. Nobody will come to her rescue. The strict Islamic laws in her country show little mercy for those who leave Islam, and the Saudi state leaves Saudi families the freedom to ‘handle’ these matters in private.

SECOND CLASS

Women in Saudi Arabia face many restrictions. They must follow a strict dress code, they are segregated from men in public spaces, and all women are considered to have a male 'wali' or 'guardian'. It was only in June this year that women in Saudi Arabia were allowed drive.

Like many Saudi women, Nawal grew up feeling like a second-class citizen. She remembers vividly how she went online for the first time to search for more meaning in her life, for more appreciation of who she was as a young woman. On the internet Nawal quickly encountered the teachings of a foreign Christian preacher, a woman. The way this pastor spoke about God’s love, about Him accepting sinners and being a loving Father to His children really touched Nawal’s heart.

Through an online follow-up network supported by Open Doors, Nawal got in touch with other Christian believers. They sent her discipleship materials and guided her towards an online Bible. Gradually, she felt the Lord speaking to her, and one day she gave her life to Christ. She still vividly remembers the sheer joy and peace she felt in her heart that day.

Jesus’ words from Matthew 11:28, “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest,” spoke to her in the first steps of her new life with Him. His last words on earth also touched her heart: “And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age” (Matthew 28:20).

Through the online Christian network, she got in touch with some other, foreign Christian ladies also living in Saudi Arabia. They lived too far away from her to meet face-to-face, and it probably would have been too dangerous. But at least she could communicate through the internet with these mature believers who know her culture and could disciple her.

HOUSE ARREST

With the beginning of her new life in Christ, problems began for Nawal. Soon, her mother found out about her faith and placed her under house arrest. Going outside the house is already restricted for Saudi women – they can only go out when a relative is accompanying them. After the discovery of her faith, Nawal’s mother kept her inside for years, afraid she’d meet other believers if allowed outside.

She still had her phone and laptop, allowing her to stay connected with the online Body of Christ, and she continued to grow. But her life was very lonely.

Meanwhile, her family started pushing Nawal to marry. In Saudi Arabia most marriages are arranged by the parents. Children can choose whether or not to marry the proposed candidates, but they cannot pick one themselves. Of course, Nawal's parents only suggested devout Muslim men for her to marry. The first two she resolutely declined, causing her family to become more and more worried about her future. An unmarried daughter is considered a shame to a family.

The pressure of her isolated existence started to wear on Nawal. She struggled with depression and her faith seemed to become less vibrant. While the group of believers supporting her intensified their prayers for her, she prayed with them – using her phone and WhatsApp to stay in touch – for a change in her life for the better, and for the Lord to make clear what He wanted for her future.

Then her family presented a third candidate to be her husband, also a Muslim but less strict than the others. Marrying him would mean that she could leave her parents' house and start over anew. After a lot of prayer, Nawal accepted this, hoping and trusting she was following God’s lead.

SECRET FAITH

So Nawal is now married to a man who cannot find out about her faith - it could cost her life, and her daughter and son would grow up without a mother. Outwardly, she behaves like a proper Muslim, performing the Muslim prayer rituals five times a day - at least when other people are around. But in her heart she is still praying to Jesus and asking Him to give her the strength to keep believing.

On her wedding day, Nawal became so afraid of being exposed as a believer that she felt she had to say goodbye to the believers who were still in touch with her through social media. Her last message to them was: “I will delete your contact information and I may not respond any more for my own safety. But please know that I will read whatever you send me.”

For some time, this was the only way she connected with her church family. Every now and then she would receive a message from an unknown number, a neutral message of encouragement. She knew she was still being prayed for. When she could, she would answer in the same neutral way.

But a few months ago, she found a secure way to reach out to other believers to ask for prayer. She had given birth to a son, but there were complications, and he needed extra care. Since then, his health has improved - there are still some concerns, but he is at home and doesn't require any more medication. She continues to ask for prayer for her family.

*name changed for security reason

Source: Open Doors

Photo: Štefan Patrik Kováč